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Archivist's note: Sequel to Anytime.Trust Meby Mikkeneko
trust me now: itsudemo soba ni itai kara hayaku kogoeru taka wo dakishimete trust me now: anata to aruki tsuzuketai hontou nikitai kurai suki da kara Duo thought he knew what to expect when Heero led him into the bedroom. Dinner had made him sleepy, but the shower had woken him up again, and he smiled as Heero guided him to the bed and gently sat him down. His strong hands made quick work of the loose clothes Duo had thrown on after his shower, stripping him down to his usual sleepwear of t-shirt and boxers. Duo reached up to return the favor in kind, and was surprised when Heero's hands caught his and pushed them back down. After a moment, though, he shrugged and smiled again; apparently it was Heero's turn tonight. For the past few weeks they had been apart; separate missions, usually solo, or just bouncing from one place to the next as they outran the pursuit those missions engendered. It was difficult being away from his lover so long; for months on end they had taken missions together, and then gone together back to some safehouse in the city. They had gone to ground in everything from condemned tenements to luxury hotels, though regretfully there were far more of the former than the latter. If Duo never saw another rat-infested apartment block, he would be overjoyed -- but even the cheap, grungy apartment buildings had been tolerable, for he'd had Heero. And had him, every night they could spare the time. Tonight, they were together again, and would be for awhile. Finally free of a city, they were inhabiting some cell supporter's empty house; its occupant was conveniently on vacation out of the country for at least two weeks. They would be gone before then -- sometime in the next week they would receive new orders, about a mission that would bring them back together with the others. But today, and the next day, and at least the next, they could make as much noise as they wanted, and wear each other out until morning if they wanted to. Heero sat on the creaking bed, drawing Duo from his thoughts. With an air of solemn ceremony, he held out his hand, and Duo grinned as he reached under the bed to fish around in his duffel bag. Drawing out the ratty hairbrush, he laid it in Heero's palm almost reverently. It was a cheap, battered, flat-backed affair, with half of the bristles missing and half of the rest only tied there by countless chestnut hairs. It showed a life of hard use for a person with heavy-duty hair needs, and yet Duo had never once brushed his own hair with it. He hummed, low and almost unconscious, as Heero drew the brush through his hair. When damp, it had a tendency to wave slightly; thank God that generally eased out when it was dry, or he'd never be able to keep the mess free of tangles. Of course, it tended to tangle anyway when they played; it was long enough that it usually got messy as well as knotted by their more vigorous activities. But Heero lo... adored his hair, and never minded cleaning it up for him afterwards. And he did so enjoy the effect it had on Heero during... So he was surprised, for the second time that night, when Heero set the brush on the bed and gathered up his hair to braid. His hair was still a little damp near his scalp, and the feeling of Heero's warm, strong hands sliding through the cool dampness made him close his eyes in pleasure. The ends of his hair tickled his back through the thin shirt, rising as the braid shortened its length, as Heero pulled them through each other quickly and efficiently. He reached the end, and tied it off neatly with a short piece of elastic -- then kept it in his hand for a long moment, not saying anything. Craning his head over his shoulder, Duo caught a strange, almost indecipherable expression on Heero's face, and he had to grin and clear his throat to break it. "Well, Heero?" he purred. "Did you have something in mind?" Heero glanced up to meet his inquisitive gaze for a second, then smiled quickly in response and looked away. Abruptly, he stood, making the bed shift and creak over the change in weight. He went over to the dresser -- a real, honest-to-God wooden dresser that they had actually taken the time to put some of their clothes in, like normal people -- and opened the top drawer, and when he turned around his hands were overflowing with long coils of soft rope. Duo's eyes lit up when he saw that, pulse quickening with anticipation and excitement. He stretched out on his side, propping himself up on one elbow and resting his chin on his hand as Heero approached the bed. He smiled his best invitation, and was pleased to see Heero's eyes catch fire in return. Heero sat on the edge of the bed, one leg folding onto the mattress as he turned to face Duo. He tilted his head and leaned down for a kiss, and Duo rose up off his elbow to oblige him. As they passed the searing kiss back and forth between them, Heero lifted his arms and Duo felt the rope drape loosely over his side, slithering down his chest and back to pool on the bed. He had to close his eyes as he broke out in shivers. Heero felt him tremble, and broke off the kiss, pressing his hands against Duo's shoulder. "May I?" he whispered into Duo's ear, his breath tickling inside the shell. Duo chuckled. "Do you really have to ask?" he said, rolling onto his back and putting his hands behind his head. That new position stretched his chest and stomach, and he shivered again as Heero's hot gaze traveled down his body. Instead of going right ahead, though, Heero pulled his legs onto the bed and edged over until his hands were planted on either side of Duo's chest, gazing down at him. "Can I?" he asked again, and Duo frowned slightly. They had played this game so many times now, they rarely bothered to ask each other for permission once, much less twice. "Heero, go ahead," he assured him, willing to go along. Perhaps Heero just felt like taking it slow tonight. Still, for good measure, he added, "I want you to tie me up!" He was rewarded with another kiss, and his eyes fluttered shut as Heero explored his mouth with his tongue. He felt himself hardening as Heero spared one hand to stroke his arm, from his shoulder, to the skin of his hand... but no more intimate than that. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly as Heero pulled away. "Hold out your hands," was the low-voiced command, and he smiled as he did so. Heero sat up, and taking hold of the rope somewhere near the middle, he began to wrap it around Duo's wrists. Duo kept his eyes closed, trying to guess where this game would go tonight. Would Heero tie him to the headboard? On his back or on his knees? Or would he leave him free to move about, only the feeling of the rope against his skin reminding him of his imprisonment? The rope went around his crossed wrists once, twice, three times, then circled itself twice behind his hands. Heero was practiced, methodical; he knew without testing just how tight to wrap the loops, so that they would neither allow for struggle nor cut off his circulation if left for long periods. Then Heero's hands took hold of his, and pressed them flat against his chest. Over his shoulder -- down his back -- around his chest -- over his shoulder -- the pattern was well known to him, and Duo's skin was on fire, nerves tingling as he anticipated each touch. The ropes hugged tight around his body, making him feel as though he were wrapped securely in his lover's arms, even while Heero's hands trailed lower down his belly. Warm hands slipped under his hips, pulling, and Duo obediently arched his back, raising his hips off the bed. He expected that Heero would take this opportunity to strip him of his boxers, but he only pulled a coil of rope around him instead. Surprised, Duo opened his eyes and looked down at his lover; Heero was focused intently on the task at hand, wrapping the rope down Duo's legs, binding them tightly together. When he reached Duo's ankles, he took hold of them and pulled them up against the backs of his thighs; obligingly, Duo tucked them and held them there while Heero finished off, binding his ankles securely to the tops of his legs. Heero straightened up, and looked at his handiwork with a critical eye; not yet enjoying the sight, merely checking the mechanics of his work. His hands moved briefly over Duo's body, checking knots, adjusting a rope to lie more efficiently along the lines of Duo's body. Duo performed his own check, flexing and pulling his muscles to test the give in the rope. There was almost none, and Duo shivered fiercely as the delicious feeling of helplessness filled him. He was completely in Heero's hands now, and oh, he was addicted to this feeling. It was like a drug, surging through his veins with every heartbeat, puling in his hands and his throat and his groin. Finally, he looked up at Heero and grinned. "I think you forgot something," he said teasingly, lifting one eyebrow. Heero smiled back, without the same force. "And what did I forget?" he said softly. Duo laughed, wriggling a bit and managing to roll over. "To take my clothes off, silly. How do you plan to ravish me with them in the way?" The smile and suggestive tone of voice left no doubt as to what was meant by 'ravish,' and a plain invitation to do so. However, the words did not have their intended effect on Heero. He reached down and took hold of Duo's shoulders, and with a little effort on both their parts got him kneeling on the bed, facing Heero. "I don't," he mumbled. Duo frowned, brows drawing together in puzzlement. What did he mean? "Oh ho, I know what you're up to," he said as a solution occurred to him. "You're intending to tease me mercilessly tonight, is that it? You know, Yuy, I can hold out for a lot longer than you can resist me..." A quick shake of Heero's head silenced him. "Not that either," he said quietly. "I'm not going to touch you. Not tonight." The puzzled frown returned to Duo's face, accompanied by an uneasy feeling. This was a departure from their usual script, and Duo wasn't sure he liked it. "Then... what?" he suggested, at a loss. "Hell of a lot of trouble to go to if all you want to do is sleep --" "That's not all," Heero said in a barely audible voice, and after a moment he took a quiet breath, then looked up to meet Duo's eyes. "I have something to say to you, Duo, and I went to all that trouble to make sure that you would hear me out." The blood turned suddenly cold in Duo's veins, and he felt the first stirrings of panic; he wasn't even sure what was making him afraid. All he knew was that he wasn't going to like this, that this was something he had not wanted, something he tried his hardest to keep away. "Wh..." His mouth went dry and he swallowed. "What then?" he asked weakly. "I know you. I've seen the way you act. I'm not sure you're ready to hear this." Heero looked up suddenly, meeting Duo's eyes; the intensity of the emotion within them was almost painful to look at. "But this is war, Duo -- I could lose you at any time. I can't wait any longer to tell you." "Tell me what?" Duo croaked. He couldn't meet Heero's eyes for long, and he looked down, head hanging. "Tell you I love you, Duo," Heero said quietly. Duo froze. Heero went on. "It's not something I'm permitted... not for a soldier... but I don't care. I can't stop feeling this way about you, Duo... and I wouldn't want to. I love you, and --" He was cut off as Duo began to laugh. But it wasn't the bright, lively laugh that always warmed Heero's heart; no, this was a harsh, ugly sound, that sounded painful in the throat and to the ears. When Duo raised his head, the expression on his face froze the blood in Heero's throat. "You think so, do you?" Duo said in a raspy voice. "Well, it looks like not even the Perfect Soldier is immune to hormones after all." He surged forward, a snarl suddenly replacing the cracked smile. "Of course I'm the best fuck you've ever had, I'm the ONLY fuck you've ever had, who else have you got to compare me with? I make it good for you, don't I? Especially like this!" Heero caught Duo's sides, or else he would have fallen off the edge of the bed. He was trembling under Heero's hands, Heero noticed with shock. "Duo, that wasn't what I meant! I don't just want you for a... a fuck, I love YOU! The body AND the mind inside it!" "LIAR!" Duo screamed, convulsing suddenly in struggles. "You're a fucking LIAR!" He managed to tear out of Heero's grasp and threw himself backwards on the bed, thrashing frenziedly against the restraints. "Get these things off of me!" "I'm not lying!" His own temper began to flare, along with a hint of panic. He knew Duo well, better than anyone save Duo himself. Watching him, learning him, had proven to Heero the truth of Duo's motto. When something confronted him, he ran and hid. He also knew that 'liar' was the worst name that Duo would ever give to anyone. "It's the truth!" "Bullshit!" Duo arched his back, straining against the ropes. He was panting hard now, and sweat was beginning to bead on his skin. He looked like a wild animal, trapped in a snare. Suddenly, he was looking up again, eyes flashing. "You tricked me, you bastard," Duo accused. "How did I do that?" Heero demanded. "You said it was okay. I asked you." "It's not the same!" Duo cried out. "I thought it was gonna be like always. I never gave you permission to pull crap like this on me! Let me go, damn it!" He thrashed again, the bed shaking under his struggles. Jerking wildly, the back of his head slammed against the wooden headboard with a crack that made Heero wince. "Let me GO!" "Not unless you calm down!" Heero reached forward and grabbed his lover by the upper arms, stilling his motions. He noticed, distantly, that his own hands were shaking almost as badly as Duo was. "Damn it, you're going to hurt yourself!" Duo's lip curled in a snarl like a wildcat, glaring daggers at Wing's pilot. "You son-of-a-bitch," he hissed. "You tricked me! You let me think we were just gonna have some fun! I TRUSTED you!" "Trusted me?" Heero repeated with disbelief. "Enough that you'd let me tie you up, but not so much that I can tell you my feelings?" Hurt was welling up in him, behind the anger. "If you don't love me back, damn it, then just say so! But if you're getting this mad over three little words, then you can't have trusted me very much at all." Duo squeezed his eyes shut, refusing to look at him. "I trusted you to let me go when I asked," he said in a low voice. "Not to trap me when I want to go." "You did the same thing to me," Heero countered relentlessly. "Don't you remember that time after the Port City mission? You put me in Gundanium handcuffs. I thought I could get out of them when I wanted, but I couldn't. Wasn't that a betrayal of trust just as much as this?" "It's not the same," Duo countered defiantly. "It's not the same!" His anger was rapidly melting away, but the distress that was replacing it twisted Heero's stomach. "How is it not the same?" he demanded. "Let me go," Duo whispered, and the fear in his voice made Heero's heart clench. He tried to calm himself down. "Do you promise not to run if I do?" he countered. Duo's mouth tightened and turned his face away. His whole body was shivering. "Why?" Heero asked him, suddenly resentful. "Why do you want to get away so much? I love you. Is that such a bad thing? If you don't love me just say so. Did you think I would hurt you if you said that?" "No," Duo said sullenly, unwillingly. "Then why?" Heero repeated, honestly bewildered. Duo didn't answer, biting his lip until it bled. He fought suddenly, desperately against the ropes, putting all of his considerable strength into finding an escape. But Heero had tied him tightly and well, and he had no leverage to free himself with it. Defeated, he slumped back into the bed. "You bastard," he whispered. His tone was drained of all life. "I trusted you." Heero stood up. "Then trust me," he said sharply. "I won't hurt you. I don't want you to BE hurt. I'll protect you from anything that might hurt you, and that includes yourself." Duo's eyes snapped open, and his gaze riveted to Heero. But Heero was already standing from the bed, moving about the room. He started for the door and stopped, one hand on the knob; Duo had to swallow against a suddenly painfully beating heart. Heero looked at him, his expression unfathomable. "I'm going to lock the doors," he said. "I'll be back in just a minute." Almost imperceptibly, Duo relaxed. He waited until Heero's back vanished through the doorway, then braced himself, fingers working towards the knots.
By the time Heero came back, Duo's fingers were red and his wrists raw from chafing against the rope. Scratches were visible on his chest through the rips in the thin T-shirt, but he was no closer to undoing the knots. Duo looked up as Heero entered the room. His expression was bleak and angry. Mouth dry, Heero went to sit on the bed. "You tricked me," Duo said softly. His eyes half-closed. "I know." Heero didn't bother to deny it. It was the truth. "Why?" Duo whispered. "I was afraid you'd run away," Heero answered just as softly. He kicked off his shoes and lay down on the bed, facing Duo. "And I didn't want you to leave me. I love you." Duo snapped back into anger, eyes open and glaring at Heero. "You don't love me," he bit out with hard, angry tones. "And if you say you do, you're a liar." With that, he rolled on his side, facing away from Heero. His back was stiff with anger and the action made it clear that this conversation was over. Gut clenching, Heero did the same, rolling on his side so his back was to Duo. He thought about giving in, giving Duo what he asked for. He could untie him, apologize. But he knew with equal certainty that mere words could not repair the trust he had inadvertently broken. That Duo would run, then, and never come back to him, never let him prove with words and actions that he really did love him. He wanted to turn over, to reach out and touch Duo, to kiss him and pretend that the last half hour had never happened. But he had no illusions as to how Duo would react. Why? Why did he react this way? No doubt he had his own reasons -- but what they were, Heero didn't know. He had drawn, from his observations of Duo (and he was quite good at observing Duo) certain patterns of behavior. Although Duo's bravery on the battlefield could not be questioned, he had a distinct tendency to run away from emotional confrontation. He also, Heero knew, tried to avoid attachments in any form -- aside from Deathscythe, he never owned any personal possessions, and though he was friendly to all, he was open to very few. Finally -- and this was a pattern Heero had seen more and more when he knew what to look for -- he avoided mention of love, in any context. Based on these past behaviors, Heero had predicted that if confronted with a declaration of feelings from himself, Duo would try and run away. And so, he had taken steps to insure that could not happen. But... he hadn't expected anything like this, this sudden, irrational anger. Accusations. Hurt. Betrayal. Heero squeezed his eyes closed and curled up slightly, fists clenched in front of his chest. Carefully, he controlled his breathing. He feared that he might have made a terrible mistake, one that would ruin any chance not only of Duo loving him, but of them even working together in the future. After all, if Duo could not trust him -- He stopped his self-destructive train of thought. Trust. There was something about that that was important. Duo had accused him of betraying his trust. But, Heero realized as he felt a fierce stab of resentment, he didn't think that he had done so. As he and Duo had grown steadily closer, the plain and practical trust they had begun with had evolved into something deeper, something more. His own sharp words of earlier came back to him. They trusted each other... not only to protect them from external threats, but internal ones as well. In this world, in this war, that was even more important; both of them were fierce, capable fighters, and they could defend themselves from any assault -- but treachery from within, self-betrayal, that was something they could not guard against. He had prevented Duo from running away, Heero thought, not just for his own selfishness. Because if Duo ran and hid, as Heero knew he would, then he might have lost so much... friendship, support, his only source of kindness and affection in a brutal world. Coolly, Heero wondered if he wasn't simply trying to justify his own mistakes. But he didn't think so. Something about that felt right, unconscious reasonings that had prompted his instincts into making this choice. He had done what he thought was best. And now, the only thing he could do was to wait it out, and hope that Duo could calm down and be rational again... It hit Heero suddenly, like a splash of cold water, that Duo had neither said yes nor no to his question. He had screamed and ranted at Heero that it was a lie, he had attacked and accused him of betrayal, but he had avoided giving a straight answer no matter how many times Heero had asked. The epiphany was so strong that Heero could scarcely breathe; he wanted to turn over and shake Duo, make him look into his eyes and demand an answer for once and for all. He didn't, though. Heero had pushed Duo into a corner with this; if he pushed more, he instinctively knew that he would create a disaster. He had presented his argument, and Duo had rejected it; either his proposal, or Duo's way of thinking had to change before he could try again. He just had to... to trust Duo, he realized abruptly. Trust Duo to get past whatever demons were haunting him and think it through. Trust Duo to start thinking with his head and heart and not his fears, and to do what was best for both of them. Heero had laid everything on the line. Now, it was all up to Duo. With that spark of hope warring against the cold despair that surrounded him, Heero curled up and finally managed to slip into a light sleep.
He woke in the small hours of the morning, coming awake as quickly as though he'd never slept. It only took him a few seconds to process what had awoken him; small irregularities in Duo's breathing, soft gasps and hitching breaths that made him burn with the knowledge of Duo's pain. He rolled over, then, and faced Duo in the dim light coming through the window. Duo's back was still to him, but his shoulders were trembling. Something told him that Duo had not slept. He came up on one elbow, leaning over his lover, and saw his face in the dim golden light. Duo's features were screwed tightly up, fighting against tears. Heero put an arm around Duo's waist. When there was no angry outburst, he slid his other arm under Duo's chest and hugged him. Duo gasped in surprise, but didn't try to turn over. "Duo," Heero said softly, making the word into a plea. "What's wrong?" "No," Duo said confusingly, as though he were responding to some other conversation; with himself, Heero thought. "It isn't true. You don't love me." "I do love you." Heero placed a small kiss on Duo's shoulder, then another on his neck. Duo turned his head into the pillow, as though avoiding the kisses. "You touch me like no-one ever has in my life, Duo. You gave me life and hope when I thought those things were lost to me forever. I want to make you happy. I hurt when you hurt. I love you." "No," Duo gasped, his muscles knotting even further. "Please don't say those things. It isn't true. It can't be." "Why not?" Heero sat up, then took hold of Duo's shoulders and rolled him onto his back. Duo didn't protest the move, still tensed up from resisting the tears. "Because," Duo blurted out, as though a dam inside him were breaking. "Because you'll die if you love me!" Heero stilled. "What?" he said. Duo shook his head fiercely. "It's happened already, again and again and again! Solo -- Father Maxwell -- Sister Helen -- my track record isn't that great, Yuy!" His eyes opened, suddenly, fixing on Heero with desperate intensity. "There's something about me -- I don't know what it is, but it always happens! One after another and you'll be next, you'll die, and I can't stand to lose you!" Heero's heart leapt into his throat, beating so wildly that he thought he would suffocate. Abruptly he moved, sitting up and pulling Duo with him, forcing him to kneel so they were facing eye to eye. "Duo," he said, quietly but fiercely. "You never answered my question. Do you love me?" Duo shook his head miserably. "Heero, you don't understand. I can't --" "That's not what I asked! Do you love me or don't you?" "That isn't important!" Duo shouted, voice rising suddenly with anger. He whipped his head to the side, and tried to struggle away, but Heero gripped his shoulder's harder. "You still haven't answered my question. Do you love me?" The quick fury gave way to pain, and Duo gave a low whine as he rocked back and forth. "Heero, Heero, don't ask me that, I can't..." "Do you love me?" "Yes!" Duo screamed back, anger and pain mixing in his shout. "Yes, you son of a bitch, are you happy now? Yes, I love you, I've always loved you, and now you've fucking gone and ruined everything, you fucking cocksucker!" Stunned, Heero's grasp on Duo's shoulders loosened, and Duo slipped out of his grip and sat back. "I don't understand," he said quietly. Duo looked away, closed and angry. "Face it, Yuy, I'm poison," he bit out. "I'm a killer, not just soldiers, but anyone who's stupid enough to care for me. Maybe it looks pretty on the outside, but once the truth gets out, then you'll know that there's nothing on the inside worth loving." For a long time, Heero sat motionless and silent. Duo refused to look at him, swallowing hard, blinking fiercely to keep away the traitorous tears. Boys didn't cry. Especially not soldiers. Especially not killers. And least of all the God of Death. Then, slowly, Heero lowered his head and kissed him. Not a passionate kiss, but a light and tender kiss full of comfort and reassurance. "It's too late for that, Duo," he breathed. "What's done can't be undone. I love you, and I wouldn't wish that away, even if I could." He paused, waiting for a response, but there was none. He took Duo's chin in his hands and pulled him up, forcing Duo to meet his eyes. "I am going to die, Duo," he told him seriously. Duo made a noise like agony and Heero shushed him. He continued. "Because everybody dies, sooner or later. And one of us will die first, and the other one will grieve. That's life, Duo, and it can't be undone. And if I'm going to die, then I want to die happy... and loved... and not miserable, tormented by emotions I can't help and knowing that I'm causing my lover pain too." Duo closed his eyes. Heero kissed the closed lids. "Please love me, Duo," he entreated softly. "We can make each other happy, for as long as we have. Maybe it'll only be a few days. Maybe a few months. Or maybe we'll both survive this war and live out years -- whole lifetimes more -- with each other. Please, Duo. However long I live -- I want to be with you."
For the rest of that night they did nothing but talk, lying face-to-face in the darkness. Sometime before dawn, they fell asleep, worn out by the emotional extremes they had gone through. When Duo woke again, it was to the early light of morning streaming in through the window, and a nagging cramp in his leg. Unthinking, he tried to stretch it out, only to come up short against the ropes that still tied him, and the realization that Heero was draped all over him. Even in his sleep he clutched Duo tight, nuzzling slowly at the base of him neck and rubbing his leg slightly against Duo's thigh. Duo flushed; with Heero all over him like this, he was starting to get rather uncomfortably hot, and in more than one way. He hated to wake his... lover up, he looked so adorable like that -- but the strain of being tied up for so long, even in such an undemanding position, was beginning to tell on him. That, and his neck itched like crazy. "Heero." He nudged him with his elbow, though not very hard. Heero stirred and muttered something. Duo regarded him with fond exasperation. "Oi, Heero!" At the louder tone, Heero started to come awake; Duo realized very quickly that Heero was in a horny mood this morning. He had to stave off a breathless laugh as Heero started to kiss his way up Duo's neck to his face, at the same time pulling Duo flush against him. "Heero..." Duo gasped as Heero's mouth found a particularly sensitive spot. Even half-asleep, he still remembered all of Duo's weaknesses and exploited them ruthlessly. Speaking of which... Duo found himself hardening as Heero began to rub his own hips against Duo's, creating just enough friction to tantalize without satisfying. "Hn... ohayo, Duo..." Heero said muzzily, eyes half-closed. He didn't wait for a response, taking Duo's mouth in a good morning kiss. "Love you, Duo..." Those words still sent a shock through Duo... but not entirely an unpleasant one, he decided. Then he couldn't spare the thought to worry about that any more, as Heero continued his slow grind against Duo's hips, bringing them both quickly to arousal. At last, Duo had to break away from the kiss. "Ahh... Heero..." he panted, "that feels really good, but if you want to do anything, you're gonna have to untie me, y'know? At least, enough to take the rest of my clothes off." Heero's eyes flew open, and he woke up the rest of the way in a hurry. He sat bolt upright in the bed as the memory of the night before flooded in on him. Duo let out a disappointed moan as he lost contact, after an aborted attempt to move with Heero. He opened his eyes and smiled up at Heero. At the sight of that smile, the crinkle of worry smoothed out from between Heero's eyebrows, and he smiled rather sheepishly back. "Eh... you're sure you won't run?" he ventured, the light and teasing tone failing to cover up the real worry underneath. "I promise," Duo said solemnly. He thought about it seriously for a minute, then nodded. "I think I'm past that now." "Good," Heero said with relief. He leaned over Duo, supporting himself with one hand on the mattress, and laid the other hand on Duo's collarbone for a moment before running them down to the knots. He hesitated, and his eyes met Duo. "You know, I don't have to undo these," he suggested hopefully. "I could just get a pair of scissors and cut them out from around..." Duo shook his head, cutting off that wishful thinking. "Twelve hours is about all I can stand," he said seriously. "I'm starting to get some serious cramps, and chafing is becoming an issue." Heero nodded in acknowledgment, not pushing the suggestion, and went to work undoing the ropes. It wasn't easy; the knots were complex -- had to be in order to hold escape artist Duo -- and had been pulled tight by his struggles. But this, too, was something Heero was practiced in, and he only had to undo three knots before the whole assemblage of ropes loosened and Duo could slip out of them. Heero tossed the ropes to the floor at the side of the bed, then turned to rummage in the nightstand. Meanwhile, Duo sat crosslegged on the bed, stretching to work the kinks out of his muscles and the soreness from his skin. "Damn. The only thing that feels better than bein' tied up is getting untied afterwards," he remarked. Heero chuckled slightly, then turned to face Duo with a clink of metal, a resigned expression on his face. Duo blinked at him, then looked down at what he held in his hands and blinked again. It was the Gundanium handcuffs; for some reason they had followed the two of them here. "Heero?" "It's only fair," Heero told him, holding them out for him to take. He looked apprehensive, but determined. "I really did trick you last night. You can tie me up any way you want, now, for as long as you want." For a long moment Duo just stared, from his face to the cuffs then back again. Finally his eyes lit up with a gleam Heero couldn't quite identify, and he took them. "Take off your shirt," he ordered. "And hold out your hands." With a silent sigh, Heero turned around on the bed and knelt facing away from Duo, hands behind his back. Metal clicked around his right wrist, and Heero couldn't help but wince slightly. This was only in fairness. But damn, did Duo have a wicked streak in him, and he could hold a grudge like... He heard another click, but felt nothing on his left wrist even after several seconds. Puzzled, he glanced back over his shoulder at his wickedly grinning lover, but a tug on his cuffed wrist forced him to turn to face Duo again. Still grinning, Duo crawled in closer to him, raising his own left hand, which was the cuffed mate to Heero's right. The handcuff chain rattled as Duo closed his hand around Heero's, drawing them close together for a kiss. Stunned, Heero didn't resist the kiss, and after a few minutes kissed back. When he drew back, his expression was perplexed, searching Duo's face for an explanation. "But... Duo..." "You said anyway I wanted," Duo mimicked his own words back at him. "This is how I want it. Now neither of us can run away." "I wouldn't r... oh!" His words ended in a gasp as Duo's free hand stole surreptitiously down his bare chest to slip teasing fingers inside the waistband of his shorts. He sighed happily. "I just wanted to make it up to you," he explained. "Mmm," Duo agreed. "But I can think of a better way for you to make it up to me. Kiss me again." Heero did.
The End
Translation of the lyrics, from "Trust Me," by Two-mix
trust me now: I want to always be with you |
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