"I would if you would stop trying to strangle me, with your 'I can bend steel bars with my bare hands' hands."

"You need to bend lower."

"Any lower and I'll be picking elevator carpet out of my teeth."

"I can't see unless you bend some more. Your hair is in the way."

"Ow! I told you to stop pushing on my head! I'm doing the best I can!"

"I need to get you off right now, before someone sees us."

"Well, I don't think that's happenin', Yuy! I'm going nice and slow and you are too."

"You're being ridiculous! Any second now, the elevator is going to unstick and someone is going to try and get on. They'll make jokes for months."

"So... You're ashamed of me? Don't want anyone seeing us like this?"

"Don't be stupid, Duo! I don't care if anyone knows, I just don't want them thinking..."

"That we do it in elevators?"

"That I wear you around on my zipper."

"Kinky."

"I'm not into kink."

"Shit! The elevator's moving."

"Maxwell. Yuy. I wasn't aware that I needed to attach a person to my zipper as part of my Preventer uniform."

"Listen, Chang! This is all perfectly innocent!"

"Innocent, Maxwell? I didn't imply anything."

"Yes, you did! I can hear it in your voice. Look, I dropped my file disk, bent to get it, and my hair snagged on Heero's zipper. We weren't --"

"We definitely weren't, Chang."

"Ah, all perfectly innocent."

"You're laughing, you bastard."

"What's not to find amusing, Maxwell? Here, let me try to get you loose."

"Chang, that is a personal area."

"I assure you, Yuy, that I don't have any interest in your 'personal area'. Hold still."

"Hurry! The elevator's going to stop again."

"Good morning, gentlemen."

"Une!"

"Commander!"

"Commander Une!"

"I do know my own name, thank you. You do realize that this... whatever this is... is against Preventer regs?"

"We weren't doing anything!"

"I find that statement questionable, Agent Maxwell."

"I'm stuck in Heero's zipper! I just want unstuck! Everyone can laugh later."

"I have some chapstick. Perhaps it just needs a bit of grease?"

"Ma'am? I don't think..."

"Relax, Agent Yuy. I assure you that I can grease a man's zipper without getting aroused."

"Ma'am?!"

"Is she greasing my hair?"

"Shut up, Maxwell, and let me get your hair out."

"Don't break any of it, Fei."

"Baby."

"I am not a baby, Heero!"

"Damn! The elevator is stopping..."

"Should I ask?"

"Commander Peacecraft?!"

"Commander Une. I'm going to find it very hard to explain this. You do realize that this elevator has a video monitor?"

"Then the sooner I get my hair loose, the better!"

"You're stuck, Agent Maxwell?"

"Yes!"

"I think that, if I stand behind Yuy, and apply leverage to the zipper, while Agent Chang pulls on your hair, and Lady... excuse me, Commander Une, applies the chapstick, we may get some results."

"Whatever, just do it!"

"I'm feeling very uncomfortable with this."

"I assure you, Agent Yuy, that I don't have any physical intentions towards you."

"Still...."

"All together now."

"Crap! The elevator is stopping again."

"Wait! I need to go get my camera. No one is going to believe me."

"Doctor Po, I assure you that this is all perfectly innocent."

"I'm sure it is, Commander Peacecraft, but the message board in the commissary has been looking very bare lately."

"Don't you dare!"

"OW!!!! Chang! You pulled out my hair, you bastard!"

"A little sacrifice for the sake of everyone's honor, Maxwell."

"But now I have a bunch of hair stuck in my zipper."

"I'll get it out, Heero."

"Thank you, Dr. Po."

"I'll just kneel down, so that I can see better... "

"I'll pull from behind."

"I'll use more of the chapstick."

"I'll work at the hair here."

"That was at least ten strands, Chang!"

"Shut up, Maxwell!"

"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Ow! First I've lost a hunk of hair, now I've gone deaf. Look how fast she runs in those pink heels, Heero."

"That was almost worth a few bits of your hair, Duo."

"Says you."

"Oh, dear. Someone had best go and explain to Ms. Relena."

"Not me, Commander Une. I'm still trying to avoid her."

"Yeah, Heero, It's great that she now thinks that you do it in a group in elevators... with my hair hanging from your crotch."

"And her brother, also. I'll go after her and explain."

"You do that, Zechs, er, Commander Peacecraft."

".................."

"I think we almost have it out. I'll use more chapstick."

"And I'll pull."

"And I'll just sit back and die of embarrassment."

"I still want to get my camera."

"Thirteen strands, Chang! You yanked out at least thirteen strands of my hair."

"Shut up!!!!"