Someone had dressed him. I couldn't imagine Heero putting himself in that kind of outfit. Pitch black dress coat, with tails and overlarge cuffs, a red rose on the lapel, and a stiff white shirt underneath it all. The pants and black boots looked like something off of a military parade ground, meant to strangle a man with their starched perfection. It did make him look damned good, but I remembered him in a loose white shirt, open at the collar, and casual jeans with wear marks on the knees, and that memory seemed infinitely more sexy than something he wouldn't have ever chosen for himself.

I swigged my drink and put the glass impatiently aside. I'd spent the party at a back table, feeling out of place and very alone. Damned the rest of the guys for knowing better than to come to Relena's party, but they hadn't had a secret love interest there. A chance to see Heero? I'm there. Pathetic, really, especially since I hadn't had the balls to say anything past the first greeting at the front door, the same one the hundred odd guests had received as well.

What was the occasion? Damned if I know. Something about Flowers and May. The place was filled with vases and planters, over flowing with the things. Any chance to get out, schmooze, and glitter, I suppose. Relena had greeted me as warmly as any other guest, even thanking me for my service in the Preventers, but my whole attention had been on Heero, standing behind her, attending the party as her bodyguard, but seeming more than that the way he was dressed.

It was bound to happen, their getting together. Heero had spent a war saving her ass and putting her where she was. You had to love someone to do that, right? I had even joked about it a few times, though he had looked at me as if I were nuts, or just damned irritating, which I was pretty sure I had been. I guess I had wanted him to confirm it, so that I could sweep up my broken infatuation and go my own way. He wouldn't ever admit to even liking her, though, and he didn't send any clear signals about his preferences. None, actually.

I loosened my tie. My outfit was as ridiculous as Heero's, a rental, and a size too large. It was pasty gray, and too damned lacey for comfort. A guy had to be careful about that when they're sporting a long braid with a red ribbon tied at the end. The oversized coat, with the full bottom, starts looking like a dress way too easily when doily hankies are tucked into pockets.

Why had I come? Heero was glued to his place by Relena. He couldn't leave it to talk to ex war buddies, and he couldn't be distracted by ex war buddies coming over to talk to him. I was wasting my time, getting slowly drunk, and breaking my heart in a corner where no one had a clue I was even there. Maybe it was time to get over this? Maybe...

"Dance?" I looked up with a frown. It was okay for guys to dance together in the formal line dance that was going off to one side of the room, well, as long as they didn't hang around for the couples thing afterward. People still didn't want to see two guys rubbing up against each other. Not that this tall, dark, and really handsome guy had a chance of rubbing up with me.

I think it was the hair that sold me. It was slicked back, like Wu Fei's, into a black pony tail, and he had Fei's eyes, the proper, cold, look that said, 'I'm just bored and you're a little more interesting than the other bugs. 'Nothing was going to happen. I was bored too. Why the hell not?

"Okay." I managed to get out of my slouched position in my chair, without looking too stupid, and straightened my coat as we entered the dance floor.

Yeah, I knew the steps. Infiltration 101, requires seemless mingling with civilians in undercover operations. That includes social graces. I took my place in the line dance and my partner put a very proper, stiffly held hand, right behind the small of my back, not even really touching. The only thing it indicated was that no one was supposed to get between us as we turned and made the dance motions with all the other guests.

It was very clear why he had chosen me not two seconds into the dance. Several ladies looked very disappointed. I was a means to an end, a way for this man to divest himself of unwanted party companions. I tried not to sigh. What the hell did I care anyway? The music was nice, the dance was a chance to work out kinks in my stiff legs, and it was a way to distract myself from my depression. I was almost sorry when it ended.

My dance partner politely brought me a drink, made very small, small talk, and then was gone. I sipped at my drink, frowning, and decided that I had really had enough. I didn't want to spend a few more hours slouched in a corner. It was time to go. Time to get over Heero. Time to kick my self in the ass and get on with my life.

"You are very handsome, did you know?" The slick voice took me by surprise, so did the crisp and very expensively outfitted man at my elbow. He looked twice my age, but he wasn't bad looking. Blonde, clean cut, and with a square jaw that made me think, 'military general', anybody would have been flattered to get his attention.

"Thanks," I managed, already sure what he was after. He was leaning towards me, a little gleam in his eye. Predatory, not polite.

"I have some fine wine at my estate," the man told me, reaching out to smooth a hand along the line of my arm, as if feeling the material. "Why don't we get out of this crowd and enjoy it, together?" Translation; let's go back to my place and hump like weasels.

I almost considered it. Why the hell not? What was I saving it for, anyway? Maybe I just needed to get laid, and once I did, I'd forget all about my infatuation with Heero? I imagined my first time with this guy, imagined his big paws all over me and.... doing it. Yeah, call me a girl, I don't care, but... that bothered me. I know guys were about getting it anywhere they could, but... I couldn't... because... my eyes swept the room and found Heero, Relena's dark shadow. I started when I found him looking right at me, all the way across the room, as if all of those people, noises, and glittery lights weren't in the way. That look was intense, personal, and said something to me without words. That look asked for something... no, promised...

I took a slow sip of my drink, as if considering, giving the guy at least a polite pause, and then said, "Sorry, but I've got someone already."

I didn't even get the politeness after that. He simply grunted, dropped the seduction act, and went to find another person to lure to his bed. I searched for Heero again, then, but he was already following Relena away from me. I knew I wasn't wrong about that look he had given me, though. Jealous, needy, and wanting... me. We had both hung back like wallflowers, afraid to make the first move, afraid to ask that first question, the one that could be so cruel if answered wrong: 'Are you interested in me?' I had his answer to my question. It was time that I answered his.

I wanted to strangle the man that I saw dancing with Duo, but it was mixed up with my shock that he was dancing with a man at all. Weren't we too young? Weren't we still supposed to be growing up and finding our places? I had miscalculated. I had assumed something that wasn't true. I was about to pay dearly for that mistake. Duo had taken a step that I had wanted us to take together, yet had never thought to take. I hadn't known that Duo Maxwell was gay.

The second man was well known for his fame on and off the field of battle. I would have been honored to have a conversation with him... about tactics and troop placements... but that didn't seem to be the conversation that he was interested in holding with Duo. I could tell by his smile, which set my teeth on edge, and the way that he dared to touch Duo's arm.

It was hard to breathe, watching Duo listening to the man, a slight frown on his face. When I saw that frown turn into something else, a mixture of depressed acceptance and uncertainty, I willed Duo to look at me, to know that I wanted him to stop, to know that there was another option, ready and waiting. Miraculously, he did, eyes locking onto mine, the desperation in them growing.

How do I say, 'I want you.', in a look? How do I say, 'Don't do it, because I could give you everything'? How do I say, 'I've been a fool, a blind fool, and a coward, about everything. Please give me one chance.'?

I was so confused, so wanting to rush across the room to him, but I couldn't. Earth and Space was depending on me to keep Relena safe. I couldn't risk her safety, the safety of the peace that she represented, for myself, for Duo, for any one man. My heart hurt and my mind was in a painful struggle with self, but I kept my place and watched my future being swept away by a man who would surely convince Duo that he had everything to offer that a young, inexperienced boy of eighteen didn't.

'Wait for me!' I begged with my eyes and I think that Duo understood. His eyes were surprised and then... they warmed. That warmth touched me, even as far away as I was. He stepped away from his companion and shook his head, firmly, as he made his decision. I saw the man stiffen and walk away, leaving Duo alone.

I felt light headed as I followed Relena further into the throng of guests, Duo disappearing from my sight. I wanted the party over with, but it was hours before the last glass of champagne would be raised and the last dance step trod on marble floors. I had to endure until then and hope that Duo would be waiting for me at the end of it.

He wasn't there. At the end of the party, I was left with the wilting flowers, the servers quietly cleaning up with a klink and tinkle of expensive dinnerware, and an orchestra that was packing up to leave, bow ties loosened, and jackets hanging open; all formality over with.

They all glanced at me sidelong, but most of them knew who I was, and they let me alone, whether out of respect, or fear, it didn't matter to me. I nursed the last glass of champagne, and wondered how I had stepped into one of those stupid romance novels, the ones where the hopeful girl is left holding the glass slipper, or whatever. It's not like I had ever read the things. Life isn't like that anyway and I'm not sure when I'd traded in my hard pessimism, for ridiculous expectations.

One look across a room from Heero, and I had read everything that I had wanted into it. I had turned off my life, again, for him, just like that, wanting all of that waiting to have finally paid off. He loved me, and only me, and there had just been... a misunderstanding. Yeah, right. I was a moron, worse than that. Heero had probably been looking at someone behind me, anyway. He wasn't gay. He was with Relena. I needed to get that through my stinking head.

"Duo?"

Every fiber of my being clenched. I looked up and saw Heero looking down at me, face tense. I wasn't about to get my hopes up again. I wasn't stupid twice. He was going to say something like, 'Like the party?', 'Nice to see you here.', 'Want to attend our wedding? Didn't you hear, I'm marrying Relena.'

"I... I'm glad you waited," Heero said instead. "I've been... stupid."

I wasn't sure I had heard him right. I know I frowned. He took it the wrong way, half turning away and looking very nervous as he stared at a vase of dying roses and baby's breath.

"Stupid," I repeated and then finally kicked my brain into gear. "No, not stupid. Are...What are we talking about, Heero? I... I don't want you to punch me if I'm wrong. You're a hell of a lot stronger than I am... so, why don't you tell me... tell me what you're thinking?"

Heero looked at me, startled, and then replied seriously, "I don't want to hurt you... but, I think that I have. I didn't know that you were gay. If I had known..." He pulled at his dress collar.

"What?" I wondered, almost breathless.

"I would have asked you to dance," Heero finished, everything about him telling me that he expected rejection from me.

"I would have said, yes," I replied softly.

Heero closed his eyes for a moment, emotion overwhelming him, and then he reached out and plucked out one of the fresher roses from the vase. He turned to face me and handed it to me. When I took it, numbly, he caught that hand and pulled me to my feet.

Drawing me close, he said, hopefully, "Dance with me now?"

I blinked. "There isn't any music."

"Does there have to be?" Heero wondered and then drew me into a close dance. It was slow, his eyes looking into mine, his lips kissing the hand I was still clutching my rose with.

We were guys, both of us work out freaks. We were hard as rocks, moving stiffly, both of us wanting to lead. I finally gave in and just pressed into him, letting him move us.

The music from the flute startled us both. Some of the musicians looked bothered by us, but one woman had unpacked her flute again. She winked at us as she played a slow, sweet melody. A man took out his violin, unable to resist, and began playing as well.

We had our dance, with music, and when it was over, Heero clutched at me tightly and whispered into my ear, "I don't want to let you go."

I smiled and replied, "Then don't."